Viral Virus


It was quite windy and chilly last night and I was walking my dog in an alley. I saw a woman walking her dog. It’s pretty unusual to bump into another person at that time/place. I could tell she wanted to talk and commiserate. She was probably a bit drunk or drugged. Had been furloughed from work because of the virus. But I wasn’t having it. I don’t need to hang around random strangers while a dangerous virus is making the rounds. The good thing about being partially antisocial is that this isn’t any problem for me. My dog is vastly more affected, as he wants to meet people and play with people, and that just isn’t going to happen for a while.

My city, Hermosa Beach, is a happy-go-lucky beach community. I heard a commedian years and years ago say the only thing this city manufactures is stop signs. Which was funny because in about half the width of the city, there are basically no stop lights, just stop signs. It’s the beach volleyball capital of the world. I just did a deep dive and we’re still ranked around #5 in most liquor licenses per square mile of any city in California. That’s out of 482 municipalities. My city is 1.43 square miles. It’s insanely tiny. It’s residential and tourism. It has a beach.

It took a while for the virus to hit the fan here. I still see people out all over. It’s a beach! But there are gaps between everyone. A lot of the restaurants have officially shut down. But a smart thing is they are allowing pick up curbside. I walked over and saw a “special event” parking sign at a parking meter. I assumed it was, you know, a special event. But no, that’s the virus. You can’t park near restaurants now. You drive over, sit outside, and they come out (with gloves on) and give you your fancy meal. It’s weird times.

I’ve been cooking a lot in the last year or so. I kind of started by accident and now when I go to shop on Doordash or Grubhub or whatever because I’m tired. It’s so hard to buy anything. Because I’m thinking, “this costs four times as much as what I make and is about half as good.” I’ve got some soup warming up right now. I was even contemplating doing a cooking show with Cliston. Not to make money or anything. Just to lighten the mood. But I don’t think I can setup my motion capture cameras in my super tiny kitchen.

I’m still going over the audio auditions for Spell Talker. I’m really overwhelmed by them. If I listened to them all, it would take something like 12 hours. And that’s assuming perfect non-stop coordination. And more auditions keep coming. I had wanted to give each person some commentary and advice because they’re often self-employed creatives like me. But there’s just too many.

In any case, guys, stay safe. Keep your spirits up. If you haven’t seen, Spell Talker is up. Feel free to leave me an 8 star review. If you think it sucks, the best thing you can do is buy ten more copies until you have experience a sunk cost fallacy and determine the book is actually brilliant.

Oh, wanted to add something, because this is a very Hanky kind of thing. Like 15 years ago, I made a Halloween costume as a doctor. Gynecologist, specifically. Kind of a 15 years ago thing. But all the regular doctor’s outfits were really cheesy and bad. So I went to an actual medical supply store online. Not only were the prices like 1/3rd of a Halloween store, the quality was…you know, hospital level. So I had a real name tag, lab coat, some cheap tools. But I also bought some rubber gloves. And that was the discovery. Actual surgical gloves are quite cheap, they fit amazingly well, and they’re super useful. When I deal with any super harsh cleaners, need to oil my bike, do car stuff, I’ll put on those gloves. In 15 years I’ve used 2 boxes. So it’s not like I go through a lot. But I went out yesterday and I put on some gloves just to be out in the world. While it’s a surfeit of caution, bordering paranoia, they cost like a penny each pair. And it’s still chilly outside and they provide 1 degree of warmth. At least protecting a bit from the wind. Even before/after this virus, it’s good to have some around. If you get some organic hydrocarbons on your hands (like motor oil) that crap will stay there for days.


I do a friday update for my patreon people. It's usually me walking the dog and talking about what writing I did this week. I...

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